The Sludge Report

Coaching Quickie: Are you patient when making positive changes in your life?
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Mr. Goodwrench, I'm not. While some people are mechanically inclined, I freely admit that I don't know the first thing about even simple machines. A recent mechanical glitch reminded me of an important lesson in personal success. But before I get to that, let me tell you how it happened. (Cue the flashback fade effect.)

After a Saturday of youth sports, I returned home to tackle my lawn. It was late afternoon, and I was ready to get to work. iPod and headphones? Check. Sunglasses? Check. Baseball hat to cover my balding dome? Check. Knee-high socks? Check. (Sorry ladies. This stud's spoken for.)

I casually sat on top of my riding lawnmower and turned the ignition key as I've done maybe 3,450 times in the past. This time, the engine backfired. Within the closed confines of the garage, it sounded like a gunshot. (Houston, we have a problem.) The engine sputtered and a thick, nasty white smoke puffed from the exhaust, choking out the already questionable garage air. (Houston, we're totally boned.) I turned off the ignition, and - being a big fan of survival - I pushed the mower outside to fresh air.

I lifted the engine compartment lid. I stared blankly at the various engine parts. (Where did they put the fluxcapacitor on this thing?) I may as well have been looking at the schematic for my beloved iPod. I decided to go back to the basics. The engine was unlikely to be the problem, as mowers are built to run forever, even by simpletons like myself. What goes into the engine may be another story. I checked the gasoline first. Nope, the gas looked clean and clear. Plus, the tank was half full, which meant my wallet was half empty.

I decided to check the oil. This would be taking things to a whole new level. With the gas, I just had to twist the cap off and look inside. With the oil, I now had to unscrew the top, lift out the dipstick, and clean it with a rag to check the oil level. But I was desperate. I grabbed a rag, and I pulled out the dipstick. (Funny how that meant something else when I was in the service.)

Now, I've watched the Beverly Hillbillies enough times to know that oil is supposed to be black. The oil in this particular tank was tainted a milky white. Aha! I thought to myself. Bad oil had made its way into my perfectly good engine. I had to act fast.

I'm a little murky as to what exactly happened next. Somehow, I found the oil plug and I drained the bad oil from the engine. Being environmentally conscious, I wiped up a small spill with Sawdust. (In the spirit of full disclosure, I should point out that Sawdust is the name of my neighbor's cat.) I replaced the drain plug and I poured in clean new oil.

I stepped back onto the riding mower feeling like Russell Crowe in that gladiator movie where he was a total bad ass. (Wish I could remember the name of that one.) I turned the key with confidence. The motor started up, and I started off with a broad smile on my face.

Less than 60 seconds later, all was not well. I'm not sure if it was the sputter, the cough, or the plume of white smoke that brought me crashing back to earth. I thought I had solved the mystery, but my best efforts had come up short.

Dejected, I shut down my ailing mower. I tucked my tail between my legs and I walked across the street to borrow my Mother-in-Law's walk-behind mower. I started to push the mower up and down my side yard like a savage. The neighborhood kids rode by and pointed. Mothers shielded the eyes of their young children. Sawdust looked really pissed off. It was so disheartening, but I still had a job to do.

After about 10 minutes of push-mowing drudgery, I caught something out of the corner of my eye. It was my lovely wife, sitting on top of my riding mower, driving around the yard. No sputtering. No white smoke. Just her sitting high in the saddle, waving like the Queen of England. (Who I've heard tackles the lawn at Windsor Castle with a bitchin' John Deere.)

What had happened? While I had indeed replaced the bad oil with good oil, I hadn't let the sludge work its way through the system. I expected immediate gratification. The mower had other plans in mind. Fortunately, my wife had the good sense to be patient and to see what developed. I'm sure glad she did. Not only because I was able to finish the lawn in record time, but also because I connected that experience to one many of us face as we work to achieve our personal goals.

How many times have you become motivated to change your behavior or to achieve some important personal goal? Maybe you'd like to wake up early instead of sleep in. Maybe you'd like to lose a few pounds or exercise a bit more. Maybe you'd like to make a conscious effort to listen - really listen - during conversations with your family and co-workers.

If you're like most people, your newfound motivation helps you start off strong. "I went to the gym three times this week!" You've replaced some ill-fitting, negative behavior or mindset with a proper one. The sky's the limit, right? Not so fast. What will you do when that initial motivation wears off and those old habits sneak back in? Unfortunately, many of us succumb to our old ways of thinking and doing. The new addition of positive aspirations and behaviors may not immediately be enough to completely fix the problem.

If you've identified a part of your life that needs attention, I say "Congratulations!" By all means, set a great goal for yourself and pursue it with everything you've got. This world needs the best you have to offer, and you deserve to succeed. But do me this one simple favor. Give change a chance. I know you may prefer instant gratification, but be patient. Have faith in your solution and stay with the "new you" long enough to fully ingrain positive habits that replace those old worn out routines.

Be aware of the sludge in your life. Negative or limited thinking, destructive habits, and looking to others to define your personal success are common examples. Replace the sludge with more of the good stuff and give yourself time and patience to let the change take effect.

Then you can ride off into the sunset (John Deere optional).

KAED

Related Links

How to change the oil
My new best friends
Behavior Change psychology from Cal Poly

Quotes of the Week

"Patience, persistence and perspiration make an unbeatable combination for success."
- Napoleon Hill

"Defeat never comes to any man until he admits it."
- Josephus Daniels

Coaching Quickie: The Sludge Report

Check back next week for results!

Last Week's Results

Coaching Quickie: It's Worth a Shot
How well do you write down and regularly reference your personal goals?

(00%) Gold Medal. I review my written goals daily.
(38%) Silver Medal. I review my written goals monthly.
(31%) Bronze Medal. I wrote down my goals but then I forgot to look at them.
(08%) Honorable Mention. I haven't written down my goals yet, but I will now!
(23%) Also Ran. I haven't written down my goals, and I'm not about to.

If you missed it, you can read last week's newsletter online here.